Work was ok today. better then other days. after work i picked up a little cake of the woman i live with and took it home for HER. can you tell I'm mad?
my sister hits me up today to see what I'm doing this weekend. i told her nothing. then i think to myself (wait can't go visit her or even invite her over) the "Wife" will be upset. My sister lives about 45 minutes away and i see her...it feels like once a year. i felt bad this past weekend because my sister's roommate that I've known forever tells me you need to visit more often your like a stranger. it's true i haven't gone to visit them in a while. so whats new....
The "wife's" daughter isn't here this weekend she goes with her father. if i did go out she'd be home by herself and probably would give me an attitude because i was thinking about leaving her by herself. I'm trapped either way and I'm angry I'm fucking angry and i don't know what to do. I'll just deal with it.
over this past year I've grown up and have been dealing with bullshit from all angles from everyone. I'm more mature and i deal with situations as an Adult. but then again....i do make it all about me or WAIT i do complain like a bitch all the time. my bad!
i feel...
like yelling out loud and crying at the same time. squeezing my fists tight and my eyes even tighter. drop to my knees, lean over and put my forehead to the ground and scream louder. i need a vacation from everything and everyone. yes i made my mistakes and i HAVE to deal with em everyday for the rest of my life and that's really scary.
well I'm signing out....peace to all you PeOple
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